I Might Be On To Something

Years ago, and as previously mentioned in this blog, I tried to get information on my birth mother. I was met with a brick wall, otherwise known as a Disclosure Veto. However, I may have found another route to the information I'm seeking.

A couple of days ago I was reading up on adoption in Canada when I came across the Adoption Disclosure Register. It's a system that matches up adoptees and birth parents through information submitted. It's kind of like Match.com for adoptions.

There are two ways of going about this:
1. Active search. An adoptee can submit their information (as much as they know) and the registrar will attempt to contact the birth parent. If the birth parent allows, their information will be shared with the adoptee. This is a long process and the queue is even longer.
2. Passive search. Both adoptees and birth parents can always add their information to the registry and if there is a computer match of the information, the parties will be notified. This depends on the birth parent submitting their information to the registry at some point in time. The odds of this working are much slimmer, but it can happen.

As of now, I'm going to attempt a passive search. I'm filling out the application today and mailing it off to Toronto next week. I know the chances of this working are slim, but it's really my last option because of the disclosure veto.

I always think about when I originally looked into my adoption info. Since a disclosure veto can be revoked by the birth parent at any time, I'm always forced to think about crazy "what if" scenarios. Like: What if my birth mother revoked the veto, by coincidence, the day after I had requested information years ago? Since the Canadian government doesn't inform an adoptee if it does get revoked, there would be no way of me knowing unless I regularly reapplied for my adoption papers. That would get pricey at around $60 CAD each time. So this registry stuff is really my best option. All I can do is cross my fingers that my birth mother (or father... because they can do this too) decides that they want to get in contact with me.